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[notyourfathersosborn]

Hey there, you've reached Norman Osborn. Sorry I'm unavailable at the moment. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you shortly.

TEXT | VOICE | VIDEO | EMAIL | ETC

Comments

text; it begins

[sidecars]

The caretaker lady is on rollers
SHE IS ROLLING ACROSS THE FLOOR LIKE A DOLLY WHY
What is spooky about that?

Why is she even in the closet??

[ Yeah, he's not even naming the title. That is on you to figure out what he's rambling about. SPOILER: It's House on Haunted Hill!! ]

text; bring it on!

[notyourfathersosborn]

That was cutting edge for the 50s.

[Was it? Damned if he knows, but he's going to go with that as his answer.]

I feel like if I said "checking the spot out for Vincent Price for later" I'd be giving that movie too much credit.

text;

[sidecars]

I'm just glad the rest of the cast seems as confused as I am as to how in the hell an old blind lady managed to get into a closet without them noticing
Questions with no answers it seems

I like the party favors, though
Nothing like several loaded guns to get a party exciting

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

How more people didn't get shot in that movie I'll never understand.

text;

[sidecars]

Wow, that's disheartening to hear!
I expected a Wild West blood bath here

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

Oh crap, are you still watching it?

Sorry!

text;

[sidecars]

This is a play-by-play texting experience and you've just ruined it for everyone
You can't see it, but I am shaking my head at you right now
So much shaking

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

Oh, I'm sure the movie is just ruined now.

RUINED! even.

text;

[sidecars]

Pretty much!
People are actually going to live now
And I just don't know if I can enjoy the movie without the threat of death lurking around every cobwebby corner!

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

Now I never said they survived... just that there wasn't a Wild West shootout involved.

text;

[sidecars]

Alright, well, let's hope so for your sake!
Or I'm coming up to your room and showing you what's what!

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

What are you talking about?

text;

[sidecars]

[ Unlike you, sir, Bucky does his homework on his roommates 'cause, you know, paranoia. ]

You do know I live like a door away from you, right?

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

[Excuse you, but when you've been through at least a dozen roommates since arriving, you stop keeping track.]

...Huh.

[He might have poked his head out to look.]

text;

[sidecars]

[ Uh huh, yeah, a likely story, pal. ]

What kind of super hero candidate are you?

[ Shouldn't you all have top-notch military training and the caution of a schizophrenic?? ]

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

Sorry you're like the 14th person to occupy that room since you got here. I honestly stopped keeping track.

[Because honestly, it hurts too much to get attached, only to realize they've left as quickly as they've come.</small.]

text;

[sidecars]

14th?
Are you kidding me
Is this house cursed or something?
Bad plumbing?
Run out of hot water fast?

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

That's a slight exaggeration, but yeah the townhouse has had a bit of a revolving door.

I have no idea, but I've been the only one to last more than 2 months there.

text;

[sidecars]

Well then!
I guess I'll take that as a challenge!

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

You better succeed.

I mean, without you who else would I get movie play-by-plays from?

text;

[sidecars]

Honestly, no one
Or at least no one with my sharp wit and keen cinematic savvy

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

Right?

I mean most people wouldn't have even noticed she was clearly being pulled on a dolly.

text;

[sidecars]

Exactly!
They didn't plan for ol Bucky Barnes and his extensive skillset

text;

[notyourfathersosborn]

[Argh that name is so familiar, why can't he place it?]

So you can't leave.

text;

[sidecars]

OK I will try very hard